Fables of the reconstruction

San Antonio

Northern S.A. on I-10 at dusk:

It's been a while since I've been to Texas, and I had forgotten how different the culture is in this part of the country, sort of where South meets desert Southwest. People wear cowboy hats and call you 'partner' without a hint of irony. You see a few men sporting what surely must be called 'shooting irons' on their hips. No one wears shorts in the 80+ heat and a man, no matter how casually attired (or how large a gut he has), seemingly is required to tuck his shirt in. I can't say the effect is altogether pleasant. But everyone is unfailing polite, and even seems to mean it, unlike some you meet in the South.

Got some business to do tomorrow, then back (I hope) on Saturday.

Flexcar

Is anyone a member of Flexcar? I want to join, and there is a $40 referral credit.

Tucson for the Weekend

I'm out of here. Laters.

Bestiary

If you want to see the similarities in territorial behavior between humans and chimps, there's no place like the airport security barrier.

What Does "Portions Toll" Mean?

I have this post from 2005 titled (Portions Toll) that refers to my annual 24-hour roadtrip to Florida, but the unintended effect is that people regularly arrive here looking for an explanation of the phrase. I assume that they are people reading it on a map and can't intuit its meaning - which is reasonable. It's not exactly obvious, and it's one of the few phrases I have ever encountered that if you google it, nothing useful comes up.

Until now: What "portions toll" means is that the highway at that point in the map is neither all freeway nor all toll road, but some parts of it (like, say, a couple of the major exits) have a toll and other parts do not.

The No-Fly List Charade

Cory Doctorow at Boing Boing:

The TSA's [No-Fly list and secondary screening lists] contain people who are dead. They contain the presidents of foreign countries. They contain incredibly common names like "Robert Johnson." These farcical lists are supposed to secure the skies, and the way they're supposed to do it is by denying air travel to thousands of innocent people (without catching a guilty person smart enough to use a fake ID). Even worse, because the gargantuan lists have to be widely circulated, the CIA won't allow the names of actual terrorist suspects to be added to them -- in other words, the No Fly lists only contain the names of people who aren't under any serious suspicion.

On the other hand, 14 of the 19 9/11 hijackers are on the list, in case they come back as zombies. (And if anyone makes a movie about zombies on planes, I want a writing credit.)

Seriously, the No Fly lists and programs like CAPPS II/Secure Flight are worse than useless because they waste resources and create a false sense of security.  They also illustrate how the United States' technological strength can also be a weakness. We're very good at databases and networks, so we default to using them instead of training people to spot and thwart attacks. This is much like how our intelligence agencies rely on sigint and spectacularly fail in human spying and analysis. We prefer the illusion of electronic certainty to the messiness of human intelligence.

Miscellany

Two new commercial blogs from Gawker opened this week,  Lifehacker and Gridskipper.  Gridskipper is all about travel, which is fun to read about but not so useful, but Lifehacker has had some interesting initial posts.  A sampling:

• Basic spyware, trojan and virus removal.
• Send email to any mobile phone with TeleFlip.
• FavIcons from pics for your site.
• Google blogoscoped search results.
• Disk cleanup hacks.
• Create an iTunes-based radio station.
• Fantasy porn camp.
• Prague escort website (with price list). ("Lovegames with the French kisses - FREE.")

Fleeing to the Great White North

For about $320,000, you can effectively buy permanent residency in Canada.  You can also qualify if you have entreprenurial experience and have about $240,000 in savings.

That Would Save a Lot of Effort

The sign outside the Zaro's in Penn Station says "Toss your own salad."

It just started snowing. We're hoping to get back to Philly by 3.

Safe Return

Well, I made it back alive, despite having put a serious dent in South Florida's drug and alcohol supply, and despite the fact that the flight had to abort the initial landing because some other traffic got in the way.  That's always fun.

Also, my friend I was worried about being missing in the tsunami zone has turned up. 

South Florida Culture - Part III

The back yard has the mandatory broken-down vehicles and a boat hull that they'll fix up "some day."

South Florida Culture - Part II

A wall full of fishing rods. They appear to be the only clean objects in the house, along with the twelve gauge.

South Florida Culture - Part I

Gotta have the shotgun hanging next to the front door. There's also a machete on the window sill.

(Portions Toll)

(Update 3/18/07: If you are looking for the definition of "portions toll", see here.)

Made it. One thousand one hundred eighteen miles. People who have driven with me will find this uproariously funny, but I am appalled and amazed at how badly people drive.

On The Road, Finally

Drove about 600 miles yesterday. Stayed at a Holiday Inn Express but don't feel the least bit smarter.  Saw the aftermath of a horrific accident last night in Lumberton, NC. Looked like a tractor-trailer jackknifed and took out two cars. One of them was cut in half. They were just removing the bodies when I creeped by. I love road trips. Just not this one, so far.

I'll Be Hibernating Until Spring

Okay, the van is fixed, but it's too late for me to go to Florida this week.  Maybe next.  Maybe, that is, because I feel a large-scale epidemic rising throughout my body, which will probably arrive in force by morning and not leave until mid-March.  That, or my face has decided to fall off.  I think what happened was I shook the tow truck driver's hand the other day, and he probably had something horribly communicable because he looked like I felt.  That'll teach me not to be the nice, personable Mithras who you read for witty, cheerful observations on the bright side of life.

I'm going to make a codeine and cherry Nyquil smoothie now.  See ya in the spring.

I'm Dreaming of Getting the Hell Out of Dodge

Not the kind of white Xmas I had in mind. Van is in the shop today; I am freezing my ass off waiting for it to be done.

Day Two: Not So Much On The Road Again

So, the van?  Not going to be fixed today.  Might be fixed tomorrow.  Might not.  I might actually get to Florida.  Might not.

Day One: Off The Road Again

Set out for Florida early this morning.  The whole point of this trip is to bring a somewhat aging van to my brother there.  Said van apparently decided to stop running about 10 miles into the trip:

Spent the better part of the day waiting in the freezing cold and then got a tow.  Am now back home.  The repair shop opens at 9 a.m. tomorrow.  Try again then.