Conservative Blog Taxonomy

A selection:

1. Instapundit - Calling Glenn Reynolds intellectually lazy would be to praise him.  He doesn't write, he grunts.  Has gained prominence by posting a lot and never making his audience think; has done those things by never thinking too much himself.  Never met a Democrat he couldn't casually accuse of treason. 

2. Michelle Malkin - Far-right affirmative action hire who is so bigoted she'd arrest herself for trying to cross a border.  Famously published a book praising internment of Japanese-Americans that was (a) incoherent and (b) probably not written by her.  If she didn't have tits, she'd be stuck writing at Townhall.com. 

3. Powerline - Bilious Minnesotans led by someone who nicknamed himself "Hindrocket."  Talk about being manly in that protests-too-much way. 

4. Little Green Footballs - If LGF didn't exist, Dave Neiwert would have to invent it.  Heady stuff for young rightwingers, like the Völkischer Beobachter was in the good old days.  Site gives off a strong scent of roast pork.

5. Captain's Quarters - Every so often on the subway, I find these screeds written in colored marker, in which the printing goes from edge to edge on the paper, often with words cut off in random spots at the end of the line and continued on the next.  I am told that this style of writing is common among very delusional people.  Ed Morrissey has the benefit of blogging software that paginates the words for him.  He will deliver pages on any subject at all, always proving in his mind the perfidy of liberals and always making absolutely no sense.  I bet Ed makes even other far-righters nervous.

6. Volokh Conspiracy - Doctrinaire right-wing lawyers who intellectualize and ward off reality, interspersed with flashes of viciousness.  Fortunately, Volokh is so tone-deaf he has already excluded himself from the judgeship he obviously desires - he's described himself as a "law and order conservative" (code for putting blacks in jail) and praised torturing prisoners before executing them.

7. Hugh Hewitt - Death to Muslims! Death to Muslims! Death to Muslims! It goes on like that.

8. Dean's World - Dean Esmay is popular among right-wingers as one of those centrists who just happen to hate liberals and Democrats.  A proud dry drunk, he works out his unresolved childhood issues of being raised in a union household by writing about his crackpot theories on HIV/AIDS, feminism, and capitalism.

9. Buzzmachine - A man with a face for radio, Jeff Jarvis has used his "credentials" as a television critic for TV Guide to get himself tapped by cable news as the "blog guy."  Like TV news, Buzzmachine lurches from outrage to self-righteousness to the furious riding of several creaky hobbyhorses.  Like TV pundits, Jarvis comes up with meaningless catchphrases that he repeats endlessly ("News is a conversation" being the most vapid) and poses as another neutral observer who just happens to hate liberals and Democrats.  And like TV generally, Jarvis' presentation of any given issue is shallow and knee-jerk, and only really exists to promote the product, in this case, Jarvis.  Caution: name-dropping zone.

10. RedState - Formerly known pseudonymously as Tacitus, formerly considered by some liberals as a reasonable conservative, Josh Trevino found that neither was conducive to promotion in Republican circles, so he dumped the name and his former site and founded RedState.  Democrats or liberals are both banned and regularly accused of treason;  Muslims are presumed dangerous.  Darfur is an especially favorite topic, because it both shows Islam in a bad light and has the advantage of not having to actually do anything.

Comments

[Flapjacks]

it must be a bitch to have to support an AWOL neer-do-weel and a world-class war profiteer who are sacrificing our kids for Exxon's bottomline.

And the prize for Hyperbolic Hysteria goes to ...

[Duke of DeLand]

I Love you guys! Carl Rove loves you guys! Most of the bloggers named by "Miss-The-Rus" love you.

You are why the public votes R-I-G-H-T; has for at least the last three election cycles, and will continue to do so.

Your idea of a comment gives little doubt about the depth of your thought process. I wrote better stuff when I was in junior high and swore off such tripe in high school.

Duke (Notice not one "nasty" word!)

[Reverend Scaramonga]

Your remarks about Michelle Malkin are horrendous, vile, sexist and show the world what a pathetic piece of dog shit you are.

[Mithras]

Accusations of sexism from Republicans make me giggle.

[james richardson]

MANY conservative blogs ban, delete, and blacklist liberal posts. not trolls, spam and unhinged post. just delete them or don't allow them in the first place.

right-wing kool-aid makers (way beyond just drinking it) exist at blogsforbush.com like nothing--nothing--i have seen before. i can't even begin to say why, except that they hate everything that democrats stand for. they even found a way to denounce the left with the recent discovery of the 10th planet.

how do they do it? they make the kool-aid and their faithful readers and posters (see reverend scaramonga) drink it with glee.

[Innocent Bystander]

And the prize for Hyperbolic Hysteria goes to ...

Hysteria? You're projecting. But keep apologizing for criminals who run our government today. We so enjoy the moral relativism that the Right uses to defend the indefensible.

Lying About Consenual Sex? = Impeachment.

Lying about a Causus Belli that kills 10's of thousands? = OK

[Cal Gal]

"It is like the left has become an alienated, angry, extremely nasty group of people ..."

Unlike Dick Cheney, Karl Rove, Ann Coulter, Robert Novak, Christopher Hitchens, Rick Santorum, the above-mentioned bloggers ...

[The Crapture]

I always love how right-wingers try to answer the Nazi charge by wheeling out the "but the Nazi's were socialists" chestnut.

Nice try...

but the typical wingnut tendency to ignore history whenever convenient leaves your argument open to an unpleasant dose of fact

The Nazis started out as socialists, but then the right-wing nationalist element of the party purged the socialist faction during the eventknown as the "Night of the Long Knives" wherein those socialists and other targets who weren't arrested were either killed while resisting arrest or otherwise executed.

[reliant]

More Apologies - To: Larry the Conservatives

Fables of Recon. - It seems like you set off a firestorm and we have all had to apologize this week.

To: Larry the Conservative - Truth and Lies: Blog for A Better America: To: Larry the Conservative

PS - Not to detract from our apologies but is it our fault that Instapundit and George Bush are geeks?

PPS - If you call your blog Power Line and you write like you think your John Wayne, aren't you fair game when your blog bios show photos of three dorky lawyers who look like they each just swallowed a box of Viagra?

[Flapjacks]

Hysteria? You're projecting.

Nope. It's hysteria. Sorry.

[Cantlogin]

Thanks for the list of must-reads as i wasn't aware of a few of them. Given someone as offensive as you hates them, they must be worth reading. Your disgusting comments about Michelle Malkin and the favorable left-wing links suggest why the decline of the left continues.

[Italics Killer]

You can all thank me now.

[Italics Killer]

Fuck.

[boadicea]

Wow, a whole lotta right tits got caught in that wringer.

Fun-knee.

[Adam]

Uhh...Malkin does write at Townhall.com. She just happens to be a conservative pitbull and she's good at what she does. You don't have to buy her line or the conservative line, and obviously you don't, but she's an angry pitbull on the right and I'm at a loss to think of anybody on the left who's as fierce as she is. She's bizarre sometimes, wrong others, and some days she's lost her marbles completely - like the day she woke up and wrote her book. But c'mon, you were SO out of line.

[reliant]

The Whiny Right Wing - An Open Discussion

Topic: The right wing is now represented largely by whiny, peevish, childish personalities (Coulter, Novak, Limbaugh, Bush, Rove, Rumsfeld). Isn't it hypocritical that these types claim to have a monopoly on courage and patriotism? Isn't that somewhat comical? Has the GOP become the party of self-absorbed, ineffectual babies?

We're looking for people to come and weigh in. This has become clear but we need more voices to drive this point home.

Truth and Lies: Blog for A Better America: The Whiny Right Wing: An Open Discussion

[Josh Narins]

Entry

1. Art Chrenkoff's "Good News From Iraq" has been cancelled.

[Fitch]

I've got no problems with the statements you made with regards to the bloggers that I pretty much don't read. Your assesment of instapundit was pretty accurate. I just have one question.Was this supposed to be humor, or just commentary. I gather it was supposed to be funny, but it just seemed like straight commentary to me.

[anonymous]

Ah yes! Racism and sexism all from the same lefty fever swamp! How come nobody is surprised?

[Exalted Cyclops]

There are white niggers..i seen alot of white niggers in mah tahm

[Pete Mitchell]

Just got back from a "1v1 BFM"for those non aviation types, thats where 2 fighters go up and battle each other,the really cool part is at the end, if you have too much fuel left..you just dump it"OUT IN THE ATMOSPHERE" I always get a kick of dumpin 500 gallons of precious OPEC JP-5 in the ocean.

[Nemisis]

Time to cleanse America of all this right wing filth.
I will not stand by while threats gather ...

[Sinequanon]

"2. Michelle Malkin - Far-right affirmative action hire who is so bigoted she'd arrest herself for trying to cross a border. Famously published a book praising internment of Japanese-Americans that was (a) incoherent and (b) probably not written by her. If she didn't have tits, she'd be stuck writing at Townhall.com."

Everyone I have read who has referenced this little tidbit on Malkin has been either furious (Protein Wisdom) or slapped your hand over the 'tits' bit (TalkLeft). After reading this a couple days later, yet again, I have changed my mind. It seems to me the comment is rather a speed slap to "Town Hall" rather than about Malkin's "tits" per se. Ride on Mithras....this is quite an interesting critique you have going. Plus, I quite enjoyed your satiric humor.

[daniel]

nice site!

[Marion Delgado]

I am familiar with most of those web logs and the above are near-perfect summaries. My particular loathing is reserved for Dean Esmay. Say what you want about the rest, they are at least honest about what they are. He's the African-American Republican Leadership Council of "liberal bloggers." significantly more right-wing, and more insane, than about half the blogs listed, he pretends to be liberal the way O'Reilly pretends to be independent, so he can tell Slate that "we liberals are divided on the issue of George W. Bush's divinity and his program to dissolve the Senate. and retake Britannia." Plus he shrieks constantly about liberals' incivility while calling anyone who doesn't support Bush, the PNAC imperialism blueprint, dissolving Social Security, sodomy laws, creationism, indeed, the whole wingnut laundry list, a socialist, a fascist, a liar, a coward, a totalitarian, etc. On TV he'd be Tammy Bruce, only he'd actually make her look temporarily liberal. Any accidental encounter with him always makes me think: get your own goddamned group, you parasitic alien pod creature!

[D Zanuck]

Wow, Mr. Fable. You did it. You got your fifteen minutes of cheap blog fame.

Ed Morrissey and John Hinderaker pick more writing talent of of their stool than you have, of course. And saying Hugh Hewitt hates Islam - you really have neither read nor listened to him, have you?

All I can muster for you (and the chuzzlewits who agree with this really puerile post) is pity.

For your parents, not you.

[Mithras]

D. Zanuck, ready for that y2k bug?

[Lester Louis]

America is last standing super-power! It is our manifest destiny to be the governing force that brings democracy to the world. If we have to torture people to make sure that our country can do this and in turn make sure we have the resources we need to maintain our standing as the last and only super-power in the world, so be it. The stronger we are, the better for those depending on us and our efforts to assure democracy takes hold in countries like Iraq. We know by their actions that the terrorists are evil and need to be eradicated by any means necessary. When it comes to the War On Terror, a strong national defense in not enough. We must go on the offense and torture is one of the most effective ways of making sure that the terrorists know that their days are numbered.

Anyone who questions the actions of the U.S. and its War On Terror, including the use of torture is a traitor and should be treated just like the terrorist.

I tired of these traitors undermining the War On Terror and in turn endangering the lives of our troops. We need to eradicate these traitors from our political landscape. It time to require everyone living in this country to take a loyalty oath, those that don’t should then be consider traitors and dealt with accordingly. We need to weed out the traitors among us and eliminate them if we are going to win the War On Terror.

In fact we should consider any violent crime committed in the United States as an act of terror, and employ torture on those “criminal” terrorist operating domestically. The police in this country need to be federalized as our great President Bush has suggested. That way we can expand our efforts in the War On Terror to include any act of violence that occurs within the country. If we start to use torture not only against the terrorist that attack us for outside the country, but the “criminal” terrorist who create daily terror the people of this country from within, we should be able to assure our future as a Nation. We need eliminate those elements inside and outside our country that want to bring this great Nation down.

If we can effectively employ torture both domestically and international, then we may have no more terror to fear in the not to distant future.

[nguirado]

The gentle left on Conservative blogs-trolling the left
The left trying to bring people together looks like the article linked to above.

I liked this one:

6. Volokh Conspiracy - Doctrinaire right-wing lawyers who intellectualize and ward off reality, interspersed with flashes of viciousness. Fortunately, Volokh is so tone-deaf he has already excluded himself from the judgeship he obviously desires - he's described himself as a "law and order conservative" (code for putting blacks in jail) and praised torturing prisoners before executing them.

How much do you want to bet he didn't say that? This is what Prager calls projection. Now, are there people in places without a large black population that still want law and order? What's their motivation?

It also happens that a statisical analysis of crime proves conclusively that law and order reduces it. Therefore, he is endorsing a policy that leads to more crime. Since people of the same race tend to victimize each other, he is, de facto, in favor of more black victims.

But, who cares? Like he really believes it. Why can't we have intelligent discourse instead of these posts based on coming up with the best insult instead of doing an intelligent critique. Wouldn't it have been better to look at the sites and attack them with reasonable argument? No, then he'd have to 1. take conservatives seriously, which would require him to 2. perform research and make cogent points which would, in turn, prevent him from 3. making dismissive little jokes.

And attacking looks. Very progressive.

Asymmetric

[nguirado]

Brothers on the left,

Sorry about the sentence starting "Why can't we have..." Leave the phrase after the second "instead" out.

Nelson